Cabbage Patch Rumble

I just love this time of year. I enjoy watching my grandchildren get all excited about Santa coming to visit. The aroma of tamales steaming in my mother's kitchen embraces me when I enter her house. It brings back memories of my childhood. I look back at those memories as being some of the best years of my life as a child growing up. It was all about being with my family and knowing how much everyone loved you and a simple hug meant more to me than any gift.

As a young mom I did my best to ensure those same values to my own children. I wanted simplicity, sincerity in giving and knowing that the smallest of gestures is as rewarding as the gift itself. Sounded real good back then when I was a young mom trying to teach my children values. But then things changed. I had to change. It was 1984, the year of the Cabbage Patch Doll and the year that I became the Toys R Us Cabbage Patch Doll Slugger.

A Cabbage Patch Doll of course was Irma’s only request from Santa. It was all she wanted. Nothing else would do. Not some cheap generic replica of a Cabbage Patch doll that you could buy at a Flea Market. Irma was too smart for that. That doll was the hottest selling item for little girls everywhere. I first tried to purchase the doll for her birthday, which falls just a few weeks before Christmas. Sold out they told me, a new shipment was due in just a few days before Christmas Eve. I had one more opportunity to make my little girl's Christmas dream come true.

Everyday I went to Toys R Us, waiting for that shipment of dolls, circling the doll aisle like a vulture. Everyday I saw the same parents doing the same thing I was doing. Some would try and prey on the sympathy of my heart, strike up conversation with me and explain how much their little girl wanted this doll. They would tell me how important it was to buy this doll for their special little girl. Well my little girl was special too and by the end of that week I had no sympathy for anyone. They were the enemy.

By now I was just another crazed parent hell bent on buying a Cabbage Patch Doll for my kid. Irma was no longer the apple of my eye, the sugar in my coffee or the sunshine in my day; she was now the thorn in my side, that haunting ghost in my dreams chanting over and over again, "Cab-bage Patch Doll, Cab-bage Patch Doll". I felt like Jack Nicholson in the Shinning. "Here's Paula". I knew then that I would use any commando tactics and force that I had to just to get that damm doll.

Shipment day had finally arrived. I zeroed in on a doll like a hawk swooping in to grab its prey. As I reached for one of the remaining few Cabbage Patch Dolls a hand came from the right as I blocked the hand that came from around my left. "I was here first," she told me. "Yeah, well you finished last," I answered back. She started to shout getting the attention of other shoppers. I smiled and offered her a seasonal quote, "tis the season to be jolly", and headed off for the long line at the cashier booth.

She followed me to the front of the store, out the door and into the parking lot, still ranting and raving as onlookers watched. I knew then it was about to get serious. A real Cabbage Patch Rumble. I stood there that day, in the middle of that Toys R Us parking lot, my feet, planted firmly on the ground, with that Cabbage Patch Doll tucked tightly underneath my arm. I think I grew about two feet, instantly; my "bring it on" attitude came full circle that day. I would never be the same. I was a changed woman.

I won at Castle Greyskull, challenged anyone for a Teddy Ruxpin and was a master when it came time for the ever-translucent Glow Worm. Holiday shopping would never be the same for me or for anyone else who dared to cross my seasonal holiday path. So once again as we get ready for the holidays all I have to say is, “Go ahead Elmo…make my day”.