Home Alone

I was home alone when I heard someone coming to the door and I hesitated for just a moment and in they walked. It was 3 young men, that I didn't recognize. The one was obviously in charge and asked one of the others to take me upstairs and tie me up. I don't know what they were doing in my house and I didn't know why they felt the need to tie me up. What I did know is I was damn scared and didn't think there would be any one coming to my rescue. By the time we got upstairs I had talked the young man out of tying me up. I let him know that he would get no trouble from me. As soon as he left the room, I went up into the attic. I know it would be difficult for them to find me up there as I knew all the hiding spots. I grew up in this place after all. It was full of antiques and just some old junk.

As I waited in my hiding spot I thought of my husband who had died just a few years back. I told him I could never live here by myself. I told him, don't die first as I can't do everything. Then I remember after he thought about it, he said, "yes, everything will be wrecked in a couple of years." Then he went and died on me. After I made him promise not to die first. I thought when he died that it would serve him right if everything went to hell in a couple years. I would see to it too I thought. Then seconds later I thought it very well may be my turn, that my time was up. Then I thought of how I had hired a beautiful family that have taken care of me and our place probably better than we did. I wonder if they will be coming by. I had mixed feelings as I didn't want anyone else to be in this fix with me or worse.

I then started to think about how I was married my whole life and before that I lived at home and after leaving home with a friend. I never lived alone and all of a sudden I am without anyone. It was an adjustment to live without our children, as they left one at a time. Now they are not just in different parts of the country, but different parts of the world. How could we have raised such selfish children. And our grandchildren are no better. And then there is the great grandchildren and some of them are almost on their own and talking about going to school some where far away from here.

I try to keep busy and I suppose because of my health and maybe my age, it is just difficult to do what I used to. What ever are they doing down there and what do I have that some young men would want. I got rid of all of his stuff when he died. I then started to think about how I still wanted to travel to see family more but everyone is busy, so I won't be doing much of that. I still wanted to take trips with friends but no one wants to go or their health issues prohibit their travel. I want to fix up the problems in our home. The walls and floors need to be redone. I can't have the garden I want anymore. I can still grow a few things. Someone will stop by with meals if I want. I can still cook. That isn't necessary. I'm not living here no more, if I get out of this mess.

I can sure feel sorry for myself. My life has been good. I have a lot to be grateful for. I don't have cancer. My heart is still good. My lungs are clear they say. I have friends and some family still living in my town. I can call on them if I have to. I am lonesome though. I love music and play music most of the day. I don't like television and have that turned off all of the time. I hate the quiet of living alone. My husband was always either talking on the phone or watching television or I could find him outside working on something.

I'm getting sore from hiding in my attic. I am afraid. Maybe I would be better off dead. I can not keep thinking this way. Should I just go down and see what's up. Wait a minute, I think there is a car out there. Is it a rescue or is someone in trouble besides me. I will never know just sitting here. When I get to the window, I see that they are driving a rickety Ford SUV and have backed up to my door to load my television. Good, I think, I don't need that. Then more and more property comes out the door. I start back to where I was hiding when I hear arguing out the window. Someone has accidentally started a fire in the van and they are saying let's just go. One of the others say, we can't just leave her tied up. The one in charge says, yes we can, let's go or someone will see us here and we will all go to prison. Then they drive off and I am running down the stairs to put out the fire in their Ford. Then I think of how they have taken my vehicle and it was almost out of gas when I parked last. My gauge hasn't been working right, and they won't know that and will be found with my new Dodge with the broken gas gauge.

As I put out the fire I think to myself, I guess my time isn't up yet. That wasn't so bad. I'm sure I will be fine and I think I'm better off without someone here with me.