The Slap Was My Last Straw

Ever since about 11:30 last night, Twitter and YouTube have been on fire about what happened at The Oscars this year. When I first read about and saw it, the incident brought back feelings of shock I hadn’t experienced since Janet Jackson at the Super Bowl. I saw the censored version first, so I thought it was a bit at first between a comedian and a comedic actor. Something to liven up the show. But the uncensored version came out and all my doubts about it being real were instantly squashed. This was real. This had happened. And I knew it would be talked about for days, if not weeks.

Then came the memes and the skits. The first recourse of the internet is to make jokes about situations in record time. I even believe the soonest I saw a skit was maybe 20 or 30 minutes after it happened from the YouTube channel RDCWorld. I laughed at the memes, the skits and the various nicknames for the incident and the stars involved. Twitter became a hot plate for debates, as usual. The topics ranged from justifying Mr. Smith’s actions to asking if others would do the same. The straw then started to tip for me. People hopped on their cyber high horses and wrapped their faux black robes around themselves to judge Mr. Smith for his actions from their Ivory Towers. And that was before he won the first Oscar in his illustrious career.

That’s right. Somehow lost in the madness that is the internet is the fact that Mr. Smith finally won his first Oscar 2 decades after his first nomination. He won the award for Best Actor in a leading role for his part in “King Richard,” playing Richard Williams, father of tennis stars Venus and Serena Williams. Mr. Smith’s win makes him the fifth black actor to ever win the category of Best Actor at the Academy Awards, including him in a list of powerhouses such as Sidney Poitier and Denzel Washington. But that’s not what’s going to be talked about for the next several weeks or years. There’s even talk about Mr. Smith possibly getting his Oscar taken away from him by the Academy due to the incident, despite Mr. Smith’s apology to the Academy in his acceptance speech for his much-deserved win.

This latest accolade of Mr. Smith’s storied career should be what’s celebrated coming out of last night. But it has instead been overshadowed by the incident that happened not even an hour prior to his win. What makes all of this even worse is that it has become another undeserved source of mockery and judgment in Mr. Smith’s personal life. That was the last straw for me. In the words of Popeye “I’ve had all I can stands, and I can’t stands no more!”

There are people saying that this incident has tarnished his legacy and have gone as far as to say that he tarnished the night for the black cast and crew involved with the Oscars that night, including producer Will Packer. There are even those who have dragged August Alsina into the incident, asking where that same energy was for the man who slept with Mr. Smith’s wife during a period in their marriage where their relationship was open. To anyone who chooses to use this incident to attack Mr. Smith, his family or even Mr. Rock for their choices or actions surrounding it, I have only one thing to say to you; shut up.

People tend to forget that when incidents like these occur, no one involved is thinking of being a pillar in their community. No one is thinking of being a celebrity or being a societal or cultural example for others. People forget that the people involved are just that; people. They are human beings first and foremost. But because they are placed onto a higher pedestal and in a brighter light, the fact that they are fallible as the creator intended tends to escape the majority of commenters.

Most people have been bullied at some point in their lives. I was even bullied once for the colors I chose to wear to school one day. Celebrities have it much worse. Imagine having not 5 or 10 bullies at any given time, but having 5 or 10 million at once. Because celebrities are in the public eye, their personal lives are constantly put on display for the 10 million to mock and attack them. Anything from their fashion choice to breathing wrong is a target for their insults. But instead of being able to fight back, society tells them to effectively tie their hands behind their backs and just take it on the chin. Even worse, the mere appearance of tears signifying a crack in their armor doesn’t ease up anything. It makes the number go up 10 or 100 fold.

Everyone needs to remember that before they are a pillar or a shining light, they are indeed human. Prick them and they bleed. Various comedians have made this point during their stand-up specials. In 2013, Christopher Titus made the point during his special “Voice In My Head” that celebrities have things called Douchebag Credits. It came to mind because it was one of the first thoughts that came to my mind when I read about the incident between Mr. Smith and Mr. Rock.

“I have this theory called Douchebag Credits. Listen up. Every celebrity has earned a certain amount of Douchebag Credits. Tom Hanks has the most Douchebag Credits. Here’s what I mean. If tomorrow’s paper read ‘Tom Hanks Punches Nun,’ your first question is ‘what the hell did that nun do to Tom Hanks?’”

In Bill Burr’s 2012 special “You People Are All The Same,” Mr. Burr makes a point that people shouldn’t judge celebrities, or “great men” in his words, without ever having been in their position. When talking about former governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, Burr said:

“Anybody here think they could move to Austria, learn the language, become famous for working out, then be a movie star, then marry into their royalty and hold public office? How many lifetimes would you need? I’m on my third attempt at Rosetta Stone Spanish. How can I judge these guys?”

My point is very simple. Put down your cyber pitchforks and your lanterns. Get off your soap boxes. Don’t make this any bigger than what it is. It’s not one pillar of a community attacking another. It’s not a man tarnishing his or anyone else’s legacy. And it certainly doesn’t involve something that happened in their private lives that people had stopped talking about for years now. It’s an incident that happened involving two men, where one felt he was defending the honor of his family that has been attacked for almost a decade now. It was a moment where a man showed that he is indeed susceptible to a flaw that the creator has given everyone. It happened, but it didn’t happen to you. You are no better or worse for witnessing, key word witnessing, this event take place. It was a heat of the moment incident that happened between two men. Let those two men deal with it. And remember this most of all: Even pillars can crack under too much pressure.