Parents & Travel: How the Journey Changes With Time

We all love travelling. When holidays approach, excitement fills the house. We open our laptops and phones, searching for cheap tickets or the best travel benefits. Some prefer trains, some loves flying, others enjo long drive or even bus journey.

But as time passes, our travel experience begins to change.

Before I go deeper, I want to make some thing clear

What I'm here isn't about my family. It is something I have observed in many parents around me, in parks, nurseries, schools, gatherings and even within extended families. These patterns are becoming a shared reality of modern life.

When our children are toddlers, they hardly enjoy the places we take them historical sites, museum, scenic viewpoints. They simply don't understand yet. As they grow their awareness grows too, and suddenly they begin to enjoy the world with us.

And then comes another stage.

A stage where our children prefer their rooms, their friends and their own plans. They start planning trips with friends, within country or abroad. You see them at the dining table only when they need something. You hear their voice only when passing. And when they finally sit with you and talk, the happiness, especially for mother is indescribable.

So why does this gap appears?

Who is responsible?

Parents?, School?, Media? Society?

The truth is every factor plays a role. No single grouped can be blamed.

Looking Back at How Life Used to Be

People often say, "life was simpler before". But every era had its own facilities. There were few phones, yet communication still happened, through letters that took months. Today everything is instant, yet some how connection feels harder.

Let's start with parents

When baby cries, mother check every thing like discomfort, hunger and even tiredness. If nothing is wrong we become upset because we have no idea what the baby wants. But our mothers knew. They understood that sometimes a baby need only our attention.

In joint families, other helped soothe the child. Today overwhelmed and exhausted many mothers hand over a screen cartoons, songs anything that keep the baby quiet.

And this is where the decline begins.

The child learns to demand the screen, The habit grows like a seed, slowly but deeply.

Nursery before Nurturing

Nurseries accept children as young as two. But we forget that mothers are the first teachers. These early years are precious. They shape the child's world view personality and emotional foundation.

Father ,too, plays a vital role. Children learn from what they see, not what they are told. A father tone with his wife, his parents. his kindness all becomes lessons.

Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) advised "Play with them for the first seven years" This early play builds trust, confidence and emotionally security.

As one scholar beautifully said: "The outlook a child forms toward life depends a lot on the mother what he learns in the early years leave a lasting impression"

Psychology agrees, Bandura's Social Learning Theory shows children learn by observing the adults around them.

The Seed We Forget to Water

Parents are the roots. Children are the seeds. if the roots are neglected, the plant struggles no matter how much sunlight or water it receives later.

We run endlessly for money, for stability, for a better future of our children. But if we don't give them time, attention and emotional presence, all that money becomes meaningless.

Even the best nursery cannot replace a parent's influence.

Teachers decorate walls with posters at toddler height because they know children absorb what they see daily. But do parents ever look closely at what those posters show? Are they nurturing or confusing? Helpful or harmful?

Most parents only look at their child's work during meetings. Teachers smile, praise and move on. Weakness are rarely discussed unless parents ask. Why? Policy? A deeper issue?

When Children Grow the Distance Grows Too

By secondary school, the child's personality is already shaped. Their habits, their behaviour, their emotional patterns all formed long before.

They retreat into their rooms. They sit at the dinning table with their phones. They live in their own circles.

But it wasn't like this in our childhood. Our parents gave us time despite their struggles. They didn't chase money the way we do today.

Many fathers return home late. By them, by then the child has eaten, done homework, and gone to bed. Day pass without meaningful connection.

One day I casually asked my husband why he takes a very early train for work. He replied "I don't want my children to have dinner and sleep without seeing me. I want to play with them, give them time, so I don't regret it later"

A father's presence changes every thing.

Is It Too Late?

If we didn't give enough time before, can we give it now? Yes with love, not force.

If a father is going to Masjid, he can gently says "I'm going. I'll wait for you, I'll be happy if you join"

If parents are going to church, they can invite their children lovingly not forcefully. If they refuse, don't argue. Keep the door open. Keep the love open.

Create small rituals like family dinners, walks outgoings. Give them space, but also give them presence.

This piece is based on real observations. Families I have seen, families I've spoken to and the quiet patterns unfolding around us. My attention is not to criticise, but to reflect on how modern life shapes our children and our relationships. If this resonates with you, know that you are not alone.