Stop Pleasing Others, Start Living For You
Own Your Life With Confidence
It can be oppressive to live your life according to the opinions, desires, or expectations of others. Constantly feeling like you have to fit in, match up, and get approval can deplete your energy and leave you feeling stuck. We decided that other people's opinions determine our level of satisfaction at what point? Imagine your life being lot lighter and more liberated if you stopped going out of your way to please other people. What's really happening is that you open up a whole new world of possibilities when you eventually stop living to please other people.
"You can't please everyone." You've probably heard that before, but how often do we disregard it and keep trying? We spend our time and energy for things that don't truly matter to us, we say yes when we want to say no, and we repress our actual aspirations in an effort to fit in. However, you must understand that you owe no one anything.
It's simple to get sucked into what other people think you should be doing. Everyone has an idea of how you want your life to be, whether it's your friends, family, or coworkers. Even if they don't express it out, we all experience the unseen urge to fit in. It all begins with the little remarks about what you should wear, what you should do for a living, and how you should spend your time. Before you realize it, you're living the life of someone else. Since no one else can truly live your life for you, you can begin living for yourself as soon as you come to terms with that fact.
When you start living for other people, it feels like you're toting a bulky bag full of obligations, expectations, and guilt. That burden prevents you from moving forward whenever you attempt to do so. The longer you bear that burden, the more you lose sight of your own needs and desires, even when you believe you are acting morally. In order to truly be free, you must let go of that burden and stop allowing other people's opinions to influence your course.
Making the change isn't always simple, which is the issue. Throughout our lives, we have been trained to prioritize the needs of others over our own. We are taught that selflessness is a virtue, and it is, for the most part. However, there's a thin line between losing oneself in the process of being compassionate and kind. If you constantly give without taking time to refuel, you will eventually burn out. Self-care is essential, not optional. You must put yourself first before you can put others first.
Consider what your life might be like if you began putting your own happiness first. What if you were able to refuse without feeling bad? Imagine having the ability to make choices based on your own preferences rather than those of people around you. Would you feel a lot lighter? How much more authority would you have? When you start living truly and stop looking to other people for approval, this is what happens.
Learning how to set boundaries is essential to achieving this. The goal of boundaries is to safeguard your energy, not to erect walls. When you have healthy boundaries, you can say no to things that don't benefit you and yes to things that give you a sense of purpose. Without being tugged in multiple ways all the time, they assist you in making room for your own aspirations and goals. Establishing boundaries is one of the most effective things you can do for your mental and emotional health, but it may seem awkward at first, especially if you're accustomed to pleasing other people.
Setting limits does not imply that you are a bad person, which is another crucial point to keep in mind. As a matter of fact, it makes you stronger and more sympathetic. You allow others to respect their needs when you begin to do so yourself. You demonstrate to them that taking care of oneself is not selfish and that it's acceptable to prioritize oneself. By doing this, you are not only benefiting yourself but also assisting those around you in leading more balanced and genuine lives.
Some of the individuals in your life might not initially comprehend this change. They may become furious, irritated, or frustrated. That's alright. Recognizing that their responses are about them and not about you is crucial. The proper individuals will begin to enter your life when you quit attempting to please everyone. Your decisions are a sign of your development, not your disrespect for them, and those who genuinely love and respect you will see that.
Living for oneself is a process that takes time to master. Like all processes, this one requires time. Be modest at first. Get better at saying no to requests that don't seem right for you. Spend some time thinking about what you truly desire rather than what you believe other people want for you. Even if they are not the most widely accepted choices, make choices that are consistent with your principles. The more you live for yourself, the more effortless it gets. It will also feel more natural the more you do it. By making the decision to live for yourself every single day, you can embrace authenticity rather than chasing it.
Self-awareness is also essential to this change. It gets simpler to make decisions that are authentic to who you are the more you know about yourself, including your needs, strengths, and shortcomings. Understanding what genuinely makes you happy, spending time with yourself, and getting to know your own heart can all help you make better decisions in all facets of your life.
Being true to yourself is the most satisfying thing you can do. You have complete control over how you spend your time, who you spend it with, and how you present yourself to the outside world. Self-love is a lifetime habit, not a passing fad. It's about listening to your heart, respecting your value, and learning to trust your gut. You will discover that you have all you need to lead a life that is full of passion, purpose, and tranquility once you stop looking to other people for acceptance.
Are you prepared to live for yourself and quit living for other people? Take a time to consider this. Now is the moment to make that decision. You are deserving.
About the Creator
Ojo
🔍 I explore anything that matters—because the best discoveries don’t fit into a box...


Comments (1)
You perfectly captured my journey and how I'm approaching this new year. Great piece!