Black Sheep, but Abundant Self-Love

I grew up with a simple life philosophy:

no unnecessary rituals or rigid beliefs.

Be kind. Work hard. Live honestly.

I wanted to make my parents proud,

it was not just a dream; I worked for it.

But somewhere along the way,

I became the “black sheep.”

Many peers and relatives,

became the ideal children,

hosting parents, sending money,

being present in sickness.

I could not,

I was in a foreign land,

raising children,

managing life largely on my own.

When I needed support,

my parents did not cooperate.

They were busy with other duties

that seemed more important to them,

or perhaps they wanted to ignore me,

for I carved my own path,

choosing own career, own partner,

big deal in patriarchy society.

No help came for childcare,

so, despite sitting on brilliant degrees,

I could work and earn.

In their eyes, I failed,

I was rebel, made bad choices.

And yet, those “star” children,

the apples of their parent's eyes,

reach out to me often,

for small talk, for advice,

for hospitality,

sometimes even for money.

Hurt a bit, yes,

but I continue doing my best,

raising my children

with strong ethics and steady love.

I try to earn,

writing honest stories,

selling emotion-oozing arts.

In my own eyes, I am doing well,

got conscience's approval.

I carry enough self-love

and self-respect, to stand firm,

unperturbed by view of others.