Lit By Love

There it is again-

that small, stubborn light.

A lantern hung at the edge of the darkness,

breathing like a heartbeat-

I can almost remember.

I walk toward it-

barefoot, through memory,

through all the places love once lived

and left its shadow.

The closer I come..the dimmer the light-

as if my wanting smothers it.

It flickers,

with every name I ever whispered,

every almost,

every ache I called devotion,

pain hums in its glow-

not cruel, just honest.

Once, I thought it was you..

holding it steady for me,

convincing me,

If I could just get close enough to touch it,

to trap it,

then it would be mine.

But,

I see it now.

The love I kept giving away,

The love I kept chasing,

Was only a mirror-

of what I had dimmed inside of me.

Light does not run,

Love does not chase,

and so I keep walking-

not to reach it,

but to see..

The love I so desperately wished to hold,

can only stay lit-

if held inside me.