Use This Secret Strategy To Help You Quit The Booze

You’ve thrown out all the booze. Solemnly recorded how many drinks you have each week and read articles & books about how to quit. You’ve tried willpower, kicked the cat and done everything possible but you still haven’t been able to quit drinking.

But, don't give up. There’s still one thing you probably haven’t tried yet.

It’s something so simple that you will be shocked when I tell you it. I call it my secret strategy and when I tell you what it is, you will want to cry because you didn’t think of it before. It is incredibly powerful and really helps to transform lives.

First, a little bit of context. I coach bilingual lawyers and business professionals who work in an international market to improve their English skills. Using this same strategy, they have been able to transform themselves.

When they use this technique, they gain a greater sense of control over their lives and become more confident. They become less like a victim of circumstance and more like a CEO of their life.

The secret strategy for success is simple: Change the little voice in your head. When you give headspace to a coach that is supportive, proactive and solution focused, you can succeed.

Right now, some of you are going to be jumping up and down and saying WTF! But stay with me. If this sounds too good to be true, it isn’t. But, you are right to question things. Changing your inner coach from a whiny negative one who makes you feel guilt and shame every time you fall off the wagon is not going to be easy.

When you are addicted to alcohol drama & shame, your number one coach is likely to use bullying and shaming tactics to try to stop you from drinking. I know mine did.

It makes me sad to remember how I disrespected myself, failed to love and support myself. Such a tragic waste of life and time. On the other hand, I’m glad my life has moved on and I’m now much calmer with a supporting coach that’s on my side and a newfound respect for life and my body.

Throughout my drinking career, I heard plenty of negative comments from Coach 1, here are just a few of the milder ones:

You idiot! Why did you get drunk again?

You are such a loser!

You look like shit! You feel like shit. You are shit!

Why did you get drunk again? You don’t even like it!

What’s wrong with you? Why can’t you say no?

Just look at your life. You’re nothing, you have nothing to show for it, only drink. You don’t even remember the so-called good times because you were too drunk!

If you are using any of these phrases or ones that are much worse, then it’s time to sack your number 1 coach and bring in a new one.

The truth is we all have a number two coach. It’s just that Coach 1 is so dominant and loud that proactive, supportive Coach 2 never gets heard or more likely has never been activated. Coach 2 is positive, forgiving, and constructive. But to get the awesome little darling into your life is a challenge.

“The similarities between humans and computers are more numerous than the differences .”— P.A.Scott

Creating A New You

The fastest way to get Coach 2 installed into your subconscious and working with you is to expressly activate them. Once activated, they can get to work to help you add new improved software that runs the sobriety, clean up your act and get a better life programme.

How do you activate them? The best way is to directly invite them and give them permission to speak up, help and guide you.

This may sound a little strange, a little woo-woo, but stay with me and I will explain the logic.

Humans are like computers. We run on programmes and follow systems. You wake up and engage the morning operating system. You go to the bathroom; you have a coffee; you take a shower, get dressed, grab some breakfast, go to work. This is an operating system.

Changing your morning system is possible, but not easy. To change it would require a lot of conscious thought, commitment, and continuous action.

At the moment, your number 2 coach is part of your system, but it has not been activated. When you invite them to speak up, it immediately triggers the number 2 coach programme.

It's like having a dual sim phone. You can have two sims but you have to choose which one to use.

When you've fallen off the wagon or are thinking of having a drink you can ask positive Coach 2 for guidance.

When your old coach starts to interrupt or starts criticizing you, just thank them and then invite Coach 2 to speak. It’s going to seem a bit strange. This is normal. Everything that we do for the first time is strange and unfamiliar. Just try it anyway.

This process does a number of things. It helps you to break old habits; it gives you greater awareness of yourself and, most importantly, it gives you power and control where you previously had none.

These 3 things are important. They play a big part in your life. Working on gaining awareness and power will give you more confidence whilst changing habits that no longer serve you will improve your life.

When you’re trying to break the habit of drinking alcohol, all you ever need is a start.

In the same way that Serena and Venus Williams committed themselves to winning and were consistent in their tennis practice, you have to be committed to improving yourself. This means you have to practise using positive Coach 2.

Get consistent in inviting and listening to Coach 2 and don't give up. The sisters didn’t become champions in a day or in a week. It took effort on their part, but that struggle and fight made them strong enough to be champions.

“I don’t have a drinking problem ‘Cept when I can’t get a drink.” — Tom Waits

You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by trying this technique. To make it even more powerful, I recommend you write yourself some additional operating instructions, or permissions as I call them. You have been telling yourself what you shouldn’t do for a long time and now it’s time to get clear on what you want to do.

Here are a few permissions that you can use to help you build a better, sober future. Write them down and look at them every morning and every evening, more if you can.

I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO BE SOBER

I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO QUIT DRINKING

I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO REPLACE ALCOHOL WITH WATER

I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO SAY NO TO ALCOHOL

Get creative and write out anything that’s going to help you. This is your journey. You can’t transform until you take it. If you help a butterfly out of the cocoon, it will not be able to fly. Help a chick out of the egg and it will die. Struggle is part of your journey, but it’s also what makes everything worthwhile.

Everybody recommends you get support from friends, family or a group like AA to help you quit drinking. Whilst it is true that we all need support, we also need to step up, take responsibility for our actions and learn how to better support ourselves. That starts with creating a more proactive, supporting coach.

There’s an old saying that goes like this:

'God helps those who help themselves.'

You don’t have to be religious to understand the meaning. It’s pretty clear if you want to create a better life, start by helping yourself.

Want more help getting sober? Sign up to my newsletter here and receive articles when I publish.