You are NOT a "Conservative Feminist," You are a Radical Conservative.

I am brutally honest with my opinion, and many people hate me for it.

I am unapologetic when people who claim to be "Conservative Feminists" are offended when I say: "Conservatism and Feminism directly contradict each other; conservative feminism does not exist. You're not a feminist, you're a Radical Conservative." It's at that point civility dissolves from the other party, and they start calling me names or defending themselves instead of saying, "Excuse me? Explain yourself."

Don't make yourselves into martyrs yet, "Conservative Feminists," being Radical isn't a bad thing. In fact, most positive changes in societal structures come from radical people. If anything, you're making a huge difference in your communities, so don't think I have counted out your relevance just because I disagree about you being a feminist.

I think it's the word "radical" that triggers so many people. Much of the conservative world accuses me of being "radical" for believing in basic human rights and believing that God loves queer and different people. I'm proud to see that there are legions of Americans who believe humans should be treated with respect and kindness, and that every human should be treated the same, regardless of their financial status or social standing. Remember, conservatives have been labeled people who think this way as a "radical domestic terrorist group." Being called 'radical' for my beliefs has lost its sting and now evokes a sense of pride.

If you only ask, you'd know that I'm not insulting you when I call you a radical conservative. I think it's wonderful that you can think outside of the narrative that you have been told to conform to. And I think that way because I am a feminist.

You may not be a feminist, but your 'radical' views are working on bridging the gaps between feminism and your communities. You are radically important to Feminism and you are still a voice advocating for more equality in your societal structure despite not being a direct feminist yourself.

Why is "Conservative Feminism" not a real thing, in my humble, and not-worth-much opinion?

The explanation is simple: feminism and conservatism directly contradict each other. Feminism and Conservatism are both lifestyles that are polar opposite to each other. So if you are one, you cannot be the other. You are either a conservative OR a feminist. You can be a "radical" feminist OR a "radical" conservative.

Listen. I know that there are not many things in life that are "this" or "that" or "black and white."

I am an AuDHD human. My mind is loud, and I have 7 different voices of reason arguing with each other at all times in my brain. Believe me, I know better than MANY people that things are NOT solidly one or the other, black or white, this or that. Life is full of question marks, grey areas, justifications, and morality-based thought processes that blur the lines of 'black and white' thinking.

Because life and humans are complicated, messy, and HARDLY ever "This Or That." Many of us can believe in two or three things that contradict each other at once.

Let's break down the core of each lifestyle and compare them.

Feminism started back when women living in a conservative patriarchal system got tired of being "objects" that were owned by their fathers and husbands. They were essentially property, and they were sick of it. They wanted to work, instead of being reduced to 'clean the house and have my children. Preferably male children."

And remember, even though science says that it's the male's donation to the life creation process that determines the gender of a child, it's STILL the female's fault if she can't bear any proper male heirs. Because religious institutions do not conform to reality and facts. They live in their patriarchal la-la land of men are perfect, and women are property, and who's at fault for EVERYTHING that goes wrong.

They wanted to be legally protected from husbands who beat them.

They wanted to be eligible for inheritance if they were the only child but unmarried.

They wanted the right to own their own houses.

They wanted the right to VOTE, the right to have a VOICE on how things are.

They wanted the right to be unmarried and unmanaged and have the same protections that men were given.

Feminism stands for true gender equality. The right to get life-saving healthcare, without having to ask a man for permission.

Feminism finds the idea that women - or rather ANYONE- need 'permission' to do anything, especially medical care, ATROCIOUS. We are human beings; we should not have to seek permission to be healthy and happy.

Feminism puts the established life of the pregnant woman BEFORE the life of an undeveloped fetus, when complications arise. Feminism stands for women who want to have a career outside of the home and be the breadwinner of the family if they want to be; it stands for the equality of all families, despite how different they may be from 'traditional' families. Meaning yes, we support Queer couples with children!

Real and true feminism also lends voices to ALL minorities or groups of people who are asking for equality and autonomy. We think that teenagers have a voice in protests in the nation. We think that men who have been sexually assaulted should have justice. We seek to empower ANYBODY who has a dream and who has been told "YOU HAVE BEEN DENIED!"

Real and true feminism HATES societal racism and sexism of all forms - because it's another form of oppression when feminists seek to be free of all cages, bindings, and imprisonments that apply to basic human rights and equality. We demand the freedom to be who we are, and we demand that EVERYONE has that same freedom.

We celebrate other cultures and music. We are CURIOUS about other religions and spirituality. We are welcoming of everyone who is welcoming of us - and of anyone who knows better than to say that we "can not" or "should not." We gather the legion of outcasts who do not fit in and we say: it doesn't matter that we are different. Because we are all the same at the end of the day, in the fact that we deserve respect, kindness, health, and happiness.

Feminism demands structural and societal change towards true equality for all - especially women, whilst conservatism fights to protect the patriarchal society that oppresses anyone but white men.

You may think I am breaking this down in a rather rigid way that seems biased, but think about conservatism for a moment.

The main goal of conservative societies is to protect the patriarchal ideal that families are traditional: A woman. A Man. Their children. And those are the only correct families. Conservative society shuns and silences homosexuality and queer families. They ostracize anyone who questions their structure, values, or who may want something different out of life.

They demean their women and reduce them to 'traditional roles' that 'women belong in.' They hardly grieve when a woman dies from complications of childbirth - because she must have been inadequate if she couldn't handle the ONE function of the female anatomy. Think about all the women who have reproductive cancers and illnesses, and how much they must HATE themselves because they are 'lesser' than other women in their low, low status of 'barren.'

Fun fact from the author: Did you know, my sister could not have a hysterectomy in the year of 2022, to remove cancerous parts of her body that were killing her, without a husband's or father's permission? And that in the state of Tennessee, if her husband wanted to ANNUL their marriage - NO MATTER HOW LONG THEY HAVE BEEN MARRIED - because of her 'inability to have children,' he could have?

Yeah. Think about that: if you get sick with a disease that can kill you, your husband can legally ABANDON you for DEAD. And don't think 'love' will save you. Sorry to be harsh. But conservative Christian men are some of the most heartless, cruel, and terrifying people on the face of this planet. And unfortunately, most convservative marriages are a transaction, not an act of passion.

Conservatives are fighting to protect 'tradition.' Feminism was born from women who could not or would not conform to tradition.

But listen, I'm not here to be a jerk and say 'dreams don't come true.' If you're a radical conservative, and you WANT to be a feminist, you can be. You just have to discard and reprogram EVERYTHING about you that makes you a conservative. Meaning you have to dig up the foundation of your entire existence, maim it and turn it into dust until you are no longer conforming to ANY standards that are 'expected' of you.

And nobody expects you to literally destroy everything you are and what you stand for overnight. The journey from conservative to feminist is exactly that: a JOURNEY. And if it's a journey you WANT to make, you can. But no one demands it of you.

You do not have to be a feminist to advocate for equality within the societal structure that you live in.

If the best you can be is a radical conservative, vying for women's health and abortion rights for logical reasons, then you are important to creating that bridge of more equality for your community. You can be a radical conservative who HATES the idea of abortion, but also recognizes that not all abortions are made because a 'slut made a bad decision.' You can be against abortion without reason, and be FOR the special exception rule.

Just understand, if you are conforming to ANY conservative value, such as biases against homosexuals and their rights to marriage and parenthood, or that women should not have careers, then you're NOT a feminist. Just because you agree with one or two feminist values does not make you a feminist.

Feminism is about breaking free and being truly equal. If you have some ideals that agree with feminism, but you are still conforming to the standards of tradition and conservatism, you are a radical conservative.

And there's nothing wrong with that. It's just not quite feminism. Either way, you are still important to creating equality.