Humanity
Short lived
There were nights where I laid in bed wondering how I was ever going to make it through this. How I was going to make it through losing you. I can’t remember anything but ever loving you wholeheartedly, for so many years that’s what I have engraved inside my head, heart and bed it was you, it was your name. Now I’m stuck with all these memories scattered around on my floor trying to glue them back together. But it isn’t working, the glue is broken just like we were always destined to be. It’s another night and I stare outside the window looking at the sky and understand the meaning of the universe laughing at you. Because it has always happened to me I just never realized it until you, until you came into my life. Loving you was like a whirlwind and a calm sea at the same time. You took me by surprise, I never even thought that I would love you like I did but you ended up stealing my heart, body and soul. Now I am here and you are gone you are with her and all that I’m left with is the hurt. Another tear falls from my eyes and my mascara draws a line on my face and stains the pillow once again with all the other stains that were left from before. I don’t know or understand how we got to where we are now, all I know is that living without you has been hell on earth. Each day I get through I tell myself that I am healing and it’s another day I am learning to be without you. I think to myself that it doesn’t seem fair that I am here with thoughts and memories of us and you are living your life freely with her. I lay here begging to forget you and everything we ever did but I know that would kill me if I erased every memory I ever had of you. There would always be this sinking feeling in my soul knowing there was something missing. I would search for it all my life. Kinda like now how I search for you in everyone. Does he do that like you, does he wear the same cologne as you? Will his kiss feel like yours? Will I crave his touch as much as I crave yours? I will never find another you, you were my person and for a long time I had you, but you were never really mine all those years were you? You were something borrowed, we were a moment in time. I don’t know how to live in a world where everything that you love gets stripped away. The months go by so fast but living in the time it seems like eternity without you. I look up at the calendar and can’t believe how long I have gone without your touch. I always thought if you were best friends first you would last, but just like love, you showed me that it doesn’t ever really last. I know that when I am old and laying on my bed nearing death I know that it will be you, the last and final thing that crosses my mind before I take my final breath and leave this mortal world. Every memory that we shared, every crease of your smirk, every flash of the way the sun caught your green eyes. I will remember every touch that I stole, moments that we snuck away to soak up in each other. Cause thats all they were stolen moments. I remember when I finally was able to wake in to the morning light with you. Falling asleep in your arms was the best feeling. Waking up to you beside me was even better. It was short lived but it was just that…amazing, just like you.
By Rachel Elisabeth Revell3 years ago in Confessions
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Quotes of Dad
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By Diane Dora3 years ago in Confessions
What You Can't See
I live with chronic pain, with constant familiar tendrils of things I wish medication or ice could tame. It has marked my days for so long that my memory cannot pull forth one of silence from the cursed sting. And, oh how my heart wishes it could know the gentle touch of feeling nothing.
By Laura Lann3 years ago in Confessions
