parents
The boundless love a parent has for their child is matched only by their capacity to embarrass them.
If This Isn't Love?
Love isn't supposed to hurt but then again "...If this isn't love why does it hurt so bad?" I cannot begin to tell you how long I have struggled with this concept of loving my mother and not feeling loved by her. But I can tell you where it all began. My mother is now “saved” but outside of that continues to backslide because as she puts it "I'm not perfect and “He” is still working on me".
By Yemoja Oya Iyansa5 years ago in Families
Wanting More Than One Baby
Many people say they want more than one baby but do not think about the responsibility of having one. Some people believe starting with one baby would demonstrate if you are ready to have another baby in the future. You have to understand that it all begins when you end up pregnant. The difficulty of getting up when you get hungry, showering, and have everyone support by doing groceries and lots more. Then you give birth, depending on whether it's c-section or natural birth. Natural is painful when getting stitches since you can not move or sit down. C-section, you are on bed rest for three months. Nursing or giving them formula requires them to get up every two hours and feed the baby. Early morning you need to nourish them again, or they will keep crying louder. Then as they get to teething, babies end up super fussy and doing more tantrums. Babies have diffusivity sleeping when it comes to them trying to soothe themselves to sleep. Then comes the period where your baby is eating solid food. You need to find the time of day to feed them. When you are trying to work on something, the baby comes first. You are not able to do anything unless your child is satisfied with their needs. When it comes to satisfying their needs, babies need to have their diaper change, well-feed, have their toys with them, or want attention. Babies at eight through nine months, babies start to crawl, end up getting cords, going under the bed, and cry when they are tired of being on their tummy. The hardest part of having a baby is trying to clear their nose from sinuses. Babies are so used to using their noses to breathe since they were out of their womb. Usually, when babies can not breathe through their nose, they wake up and become very irritable. Having them on a schedule would help them sleep throughout the night. Then soon, babies will start to walk. That's when they start grabbing and going through everything that they can get their hands on.
By Vicky Alcazar5 years ago in Families
YOUR LEGACY
December 28th 1959 you were born. On Sunday August 2, 1981 I your daughter, your firs celebrating. Now it's the 17th and I'm 12 years old and I'm mourning a loss that will forever effect me and I have never been the same since. It's been 27 years 4 months and 12 days and counting. Every year whenever the anniversary or your death, burial or birthday comes around I often reflect on how different my life would have been, how different his would have been, how different yours would have been, how his bird would of been if they survived, am I making you proud, am I living up to the promise I made to you. Am I your legacy living up to the legacy you left behind. These are questions I reflect on often but even more so on days like today your birthday. On days like today your absence effects differently every year. On days like this I miss you more, I wish you were here so I can ask the questions that I never got to ask you and tell you that I LOVE YOU MOMMY. Instead I settle for telling you in my thoughts and hope that you can hear me where you are. Memories of you are forever in my heart. I wish Heaven had visiting hours. It’s been so long that I can remember face but not your face. I can remember your face because of pictures I the living room of the old house, or the screensaver on my phone. It’s easy to remember your face when your face is my face.The mirror reflects you in me. I’m often told I look like you. Some have told me I act like you. One of your sisters once said to me “Just like Freida” and I simply stated I’m her daughter”. To be your daughter and to be told I’m like you and to have you for the short time I did was is an honor. I just wish it was longer. Things aren't the best down here right now and the struggle is real but so is God and the strength, love and leadership and so many other qualities that you passed on to me. I try to follow your example daily. I’m often put in the same position of leader, that strong person that everyone comes to for all there issues be it advice or just a listening ear or a helping had as I’m sure you were also, in fact I know you were. I’ve told the stories from those who hold fond memories of you and words like cool, al tight and sentiments like loyal, responsible just to. name a few are mentioned. I wonder how you handled it all. I wish you were here to have that conversation. I wonder if you felt alone or not. There are answers that I may never have to d St o many questions I wish I could ask you, but I have your memories, the memories you left with others and the stories that they tell of you and the example you left behind. With that within me and left for I use it to go my best to make you proud and create my own legacy for those coming after me.
By Le’Keshia C. Bell5 years ago in Families
8x7
Quite the year it’s been right? Lets roll into the new age version of the roarin’ ‘20s with a bad case of the flu, leading to a year-long pandemic causing a NATIONAL QUARANTINE, then round it all out with a “rigged election”. To top it all off adults are being considered essential or non-essential which decides their job status but our children are getting sent home with the most outlandish letters! “Principal Wilson here to inform you that all students must wear masks! If they do not abide by our new city ordained safety protocols it will be a punishable offense.” What the heck? Now my 4th grader is worried about which Colleges are going to deny her because she didn’t wear her mask durkng RECESS! Oh, but beyond that Sir Principal McWilson calls home in the middle of a regular old tuesday... for what?! “I’m so sorry to bother you, your daughters not in any trouble. She was involved in a food fight and when lined up with the other students she told THE TRUTH so she will not be punished.” Okay, so first he wastes my time with an advisory letter, but now McWilson wants to interrupt my day to let me know he in fact questions my daughters integrity?! Well let me question him this, why wasn’t I contacted even 1 of the 17 times my daughter went to the nurses office last month when she continuously gets balls thrown at her head during recess?! Why don’t you just save your breath and my time and call snotty nose Sams mom and potty mouth Petes dad to let them know that they’re terrorizing my kid every day on the playground, huh! The biggest kicker of the whole schooling system now is that our KIDS get to choose whether they would prefer in class school days or DISTANCE LEARNING. What the hell! Really? So us adults are told if were essential or not but our kids call their shots for schooling now?! After a 14 day quarantine because my kid is “exposed to the Rona” she decides we’re going to give this distance learning a shot for her upcoming semester. While quarantined shes learning her times tables. She hates it’s I hate it we both give up now shes scared shes going to be an uneducated bum under a bridge and I’m worried about “whats 8x7”... she looks at me slyly and says why do you need to know I said “just cause I need to know!” Then the thing happened. She put her headphones straight on her head, laid upside down in the arm chair and acts like I never asked. Someone please give me strength through this semester of distance learning because damn, those times tables are gonna be the death of me.
By Kadi Starms5 years ago in Families
Nature vs Nurture:
Our kids grow to be their own person by watching and learning from the people around them, family and friends mostly. But what about about the kids who have one or both biological parent(s) missing from their lives...? Can some personality traits be inherited or is it all strictly learned behavior? Its kinda like the age old 'nature vs nurture' argument.
By Jennifer Matthias5 years ago in Families
A Third-Grade Education Didn’t Stop My Father
My father, Elvin Mansfield, was born into poverty in 1929, and his life was mostly a struggle. His formal education ended with the third grade. However, he never stopped learning and doing what he needed to do to make the most of his situation.
By Terry Mansfield5 years ago in Families
The Pain of Parenthood
Sometimes I wish I could do it all over again. I sit and I recollect on the events in my life that lead up to my child being born, I sit and I ponder about how I had the opportunity to do things the right way but chose the wrong way, therefore leading to my child being born into dysfunction. I often find myself being caught up in my shortcomings due to the fact I know I’m capable of so much more. I am grateful to have made it out of my teens with no children, but very much so disappointed in the fact I still had my child young. No one can prepare you for motherhood, not even yourself. This is because you are going through something you have never experienced before in your life. In my opinion, no matter how much you read, listen to stories, and even help with small children, motherhood is just one thing you cant prepare for. When I say this I mean, when you go to have your first child there is nothing you can do to truly prepare yourself. You don’t know what to expect because you have never been through it. How can you prepare yourself for pain you never experienced? That’s the most troubling thing about motherhood for me, the pain this beautiful thing brings you. I expected motherhood and pregnancy to have been this beautiful and exciting event. It was the complete opposite of that in my case, so I often find myself looking at my child in a skewed view. I dont hate my child, I don't resent my child, but I do wish I would have waited. Looking back now, I wish I would have followed my spirit. I know matter of fact my life would have been better, which in turn would have made theirs better as well. I find it ironic because you would never know I feel this way due to the fact my child is loved and they exemplify this in every way imaginable. But I often sit and think about the traumatic pregnancy I endured and the struggles we currently face. I can’t go and grind like I used too due to the fact I now have another human being to look after. That’s annoying as hell. Then I have to sit and calculate down to the minute on how many hours I need to work in order to have the basics covered, you can forget about anything “extra”. I hate that I even put myself in this boat, I know it can be made out of but why on earth did I do this in the first place. It was selfish as hell if you ask me, but it is so crazy because my child needs for nothing. They have been covered and taken care of since before they entered this realm. But I am so hard on myself due to the fact I know I am capable of more. So, the feeling of regret, loneliness, and anger are all normal in this journey of motherhood. I just wish I could have done things better, I never wanted my child to have to experience any type of struggle. I never wanted them to experience any kind of pain due to their circumstances, I wanted my children to grow up living a Huxtable type lifestyle. That’s what they deserve and only if I wouldn’t have been so selfish. But I also too have to give myself credit for the fact that my child is loved and very well taken care of. I do my best with what is provided to me. I just know I could be so much more and do way better than what I am currently doing. I said all this to say the emotional rollercoaster you feel with motherhood is normal. The good, the bad and the downright ugly, it’s all normal. Remind yourself you’re doing the best you can and that if you could do more you know you would, but this is all you have for the moment. Be kind to yourself for you are the CEO of a non stop business (your children and household are the business here) and you are a multifaceted woman. Only worry about what you can control and let the rest go. For mothers are phenomenal women who truly aren’t credited enough if you ask me. Love yourself a little extra and be gentle.
By Mother Amaru 5 years ago in Families
Breastfeeding Made Easy For All Moms.
Introduction Breastfeeding; it seems so natural and easy when you see experienced moms with a good let down doing it, as they have nice eye contact with their little ones while the little ones make all manner of ‘happy baby’ movements with their hands and legs.
By Cassandra Osorio5 years ago in Families
A Gift Guide For My Mom
A Gift Guide for My Mom My mom is 83 years old. She was a wife for 62 years. She’s the mom of six grown children. She has sixteen grandchildren – not including the steps and halves and all the grands’ friends. She’s a great grandma too. She is a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Mom is short in stature (and shrinking as time goes on!) but she has a large presence. Her laugh is loud and contagious. Her smile is big, bright, and beautiful. She has opinions and isn’t encumbered whatsoever to state them. She has a lot of love in her heart for everyone. Mom loves the underdog, the least of us.
By Keli Maire5 years ago in Families
Leading By Example
I was in the process of moving into my very first apartment. I was nervous and slightly apprehensive of moving out of the nest. My mother was very apprehensive of me moving out as well which of course makes sense because she does not want to see her little baby leave the home. However my step father was adamant about me leaving the home. He would say "It is time for you to be a man and be independent and live on your own." My step father was really the catalyst of me finally leaving the home. I knew deep down I wanted to do it but I was nervous and hesitant, however my step father was the kick in the ass that I needed to finally spread my wings and fly away. I was meeting with the superintendent that day with my girlfriend, mother and stepfather. As I was in the process of reviewing the lease the superintendent asked my mother and step father if they can be co signers of the lease. Before my mother could answer my step father gave the superintendent a hard "No". The superintendent was somewhat taken aback my my stepfathers assertiveness and from stating he was not going to be a co signer for the apartment. He said " We are absolutely not signing because we don't have to. My step son is mature and responsible enough to be able to pay for his own apartment on his own. He does not need us to be a safety net for him, he can handle the responsibility of financially supporting an apartment on his own. "My step father's response to the superintendent was inspiring to me. It was nerve wrecking having the responsibility to pay for an apartment on my own. However his confidence that he had in me inspired me to find the confidence in myself. The truth of the matter is I don't believe that if it was not for him I would have had the confidence to support myself in my first apartment. If he was not their and it was up to my mother she would have signed the lease to be my financial safety net for the rent. By doing this it would have sent the subtle indirect message to me that I am unable to support myself and be independent. Despite the push back the my step father got from my mother and the superintendent he did not cave. He held his ground and he was adamant of not co signing the lease. His calm certainty and assertiveness was inspiring. I looked at him think "Wow, I wish I could be as strong a verbally assertive, and calm as he was. The very next day I was having dinner with my girlfriend at the time she said "Your step father was a somewhat rude to the superintendent yesterday wasn't he?" I looked at her and "No, I don't think he was rude at all." He was stating what he felt and he felt that I had the ability of supporting myself in my own apartment. I really looked up to the fact that he was able to be so certain of of his stance of the apartment despite the amount of push back that he got from my mother or superintendent. That to me that was a leadership quality I wish I had. A few months later my girlfriend and I were having dinner at mother and step father's apartment. My mother and my girlfriend were finished dinner and they were assembling cloths in the bedroom. My step father and I were having our dinner and chit chatting in the dining room. Moments later my mother and girlfriend came around the corner and they both look at me and said. Logan, come with us now you need to try some clothes on that we bought for you." I felt annoyed and agitating because I was still in the middle of dinner. I looked at both of them and said in whiny tone of voice "But, I'm in the middle of dinner, can't I at least finish my meal?" "My girlfriend said "No! Get up and come try these clothes on now." I felt frustrated and disrespected by her demands and tone of voice. I was not sure of to handle the situation. Do I stand my ground or comply with their demands? I turned to my step father who was sitting next to me to see his reaction to this situation. He had very amused look on his face like he was enjoying watching this situation unfold. I was looking at him for some sort of solution to the situation. He looked at me in the eye and very calmly he said "You know what to do." It took a few seconds for me to realize what he wanted to do. He was not saying it verbally but I was able to read his sub communications. I knew now the course of action that I needed to take. I turned to my mother and girlfriend and they were able to see that my energy and vibe completely changed. I said to the both of them no longer in a frantic, uncertain, insecure tone, but in a calm, assertive and certain tone "I am going to finish my dinner when I am done then I will join you, I would appreciate it if the both of you would leave me be, respect my dinner time and go about your business. That's the way its going to be". My mother walked away calmly. My girlfriend scolded me for a few moments and just stared at her grinning confidently. She eventually walked away. I turned to my step father for his reaction to the situation. He looked at me with a proud look on his face and said "That is how its done, very good." He held up his glass of wine I held up my beer and we cheered each other. He lead me to the proper course of action and I delivered. My step father showed me on a consistent how to model positive strong behavior. He knew that he was in a leadership to me and his own son from his previous marriage and we both were watching him to see how to conduct ourselves in the world as men. Through difficult situation he was able to lead me by example.
By Logan Rider5 years ago in Families
