Humor
His Divine Itchiness
You know that itch you get right as youâre trying to nod off to sleep? The one that youâre not sure existed even after youâve scratched the offending area? The one that springs up again on another part of your body when youâve settled back in, snug under the covers? Thatâs me. Some may call me silly names like the Itch Fairy, but I prefer to think of myself as The Immortal God of Itchiness. You may call me Your Divine Itchiness. In my opinion, I am an essential, natural force in the world. Which would make me a god in the vein of Boreas, Notus, Zephyrus, and Eurus. (For those of you that never took Classics, I pity you. Those are the Four Winds of Greek Mythology. Though I never particularly liked them much, too flighty. Couldnât nail them down in an RSVP for any party.) Plus Iâve never died, so thereâs Exhibit A for immortality. Perhaps the only argument against my divinity is the fact that I feel the need to explain myself. But not being able to hold myself back is part of my highly endearing personality, so I think itâs fine.
By Mark (Mitch) Weil3 years ago in Fiction
Bird Poo Flu and the Pink Sombrero
No matter how many times he saw those things, he never got used to them. He blamed them for his adult-onset Touretteâs syndrome, which tended to flare up at the most inopportune times: at shops, at bars, and at job interviews. Those things â those obnoxious cranial accessories â came to represent everything that was wrong with the world. They were symbols of deception and propaganda, giant beacons of a collective aversion to critical thinking, and ubiquitous reminders of a blind compliance to authority. Those oversized, obnoxiously garish monstrosities had single-handedly transformed a once-functional member of society into an Underground Man: a venomous, misanthropic recluse. They were cumbersome. They were pink. And they housed zombie brains.
By J.C. Finnegan3 years ago in Fiction
Why is the Wind Sword Patriarch blindfolded?
It is said that Bibidong re-election of the seven clans is the animal world, which is either leopards or antelopes, and bees and elephants, almost all of these martial spirits are animals, only the Wind Sword Sect people like a person. Why is the Wind Sword Sect so special? Obviously the animation is its consideration, the animation of this clan is not only a special martial spirit, look strange enough, the patriarch's eyes were blindfolded by cloth, this operation in the end because of what? It is difficult not to be the patriarch is blind?
By Bo Fu Long3 years ago in Fiction
Twisted Tales for Toilet Time: Volume II, Part III
Midnight Once Upon an Hour of Time⊠At Midnight during the middle of the night, a large dark barn owl swooped down from a branch and dug its claws into a small field mouse that was scurrying across the ground. The owl returned to its branch and began offering pieces of the mouse to his fellow night owls that shared the tree. All kinds of reasons and excuses came out of their beaks.
By Savannah K. Wilson3 years ago in Fiction
