Being Transgender but...

Hello, my name is Ashley and I would like to share my story of being transgender.

From a very young age I struggled with societies image of being a girl. I felt like everyone expected me to be a "girly girl" which is something that I knew that I was NOT. I was never raised in a family with a mother and a father. When my parents split I spent 5 out of 7 days living with my father, grandfather and grandmother. I didn't have a mother role model but I never thought that would have an impact on my discovery into being transgender.

At 15 after a lot of research into the LGBTQ+ community I found the term "transgender" and continued to dive deeper into it. I watched videos, read articles and went on forums to speak to people who also identified under that section of the community. After much deliberation I decided that I was transgender. I decided to come out socially first so as I was still in school I spoke to some friends first and asked them to refer to me as he/him and Austin. They respected that and as they made me feel so comfortable and safe I decided to tell my father. He was so supportive and took me to all of my appointments and helped me fight my way through the NHS and get my hormone replacement therapy of testosterone shots which i took for just over a year.

Skip forward three years and I had moved out and settled down in a happy relationship with the man of my dreams. However, for some reason I was still struggling with my identity despite being so confident of who I was. Lucky for me I have a very supportive partner who sat and spoke with me for hours about why I was struggling. I left it for a few months to see if it was a phase but nothing changed.

After realising I was still struggling with my gender I decided to experiment with some feminine clothing. I wore it around our home for a bit and saw myself become so much more confident and happy in myself. I decided to branch out a bit and started to go around the public in some feminine clothing and I was walking around with a smile on my face and so much more confidence.

I am not saying that this is the case for all transgender individuals but I personally believe that I was rushed through the system. I don't believe that psychologists and counsellors have the right to diagnose someone after knowing them for a limited amount of time.

I am going to be creating more stories where I dive deeper into my personal struggles in discovering that I was transgender and also my discoveries into why I know I made the wrong choice.

~ Ashley