The Man Who Was Too Literal

John was a man who took everything people said at face value. He didn't understand figurative language, and he always took things literally.

One day, John was walking down the street when he saw a sign that said, "Free puppies." He went up to the sign and asked the person who was standing there, "Are these puppies really free?"

The person looked at John like he was crazy and said, "Of course they're free! That's what the sign says."

John was confused. "But how can puppies be free?" he asked. "They have to cost something, right?"

The person sighed and said, "Just take a puppy and go. They're free."

John took a puppy and walked away, still confused. He didn't understand how something could be free if it had to cost something.

Later that day, John was walking home when he saw a sign that said, "Danger! High Voltage." He stopped and looked at the sign, then he looked up at the power lines. "I don't see any voltage," he said to himself.

Just then, a spark flew from one of the power lines and hit John in the face. John fell to the ground, screaming in pain.

A woman who was walking by saw what happened and ran over to help John. "Are you okay?" she asked.

John opened his eyes and looked at the woman. "I'm fine," he said. "I just don't understand. The sign said there was high voltage, but I didn't see any."

The woman shook her head. "You're too literal," she said. "The sign was warning you about the danger of high voltage, even though you couldn't see it."

John thought about what the woman said. "I guess you're right," he said. "I need to start thinking more figuratively."

And with that, John learned a valuable lesson about the importance of figurative language.

But John's literalness didn't end there. The next day, he was at the grocery store when he saw a sign that said, "Sale! 50% off all apples." John went up to the produce aisle and started looking at the apples.

"These apples are still $1 each," he said to the cashier. "The sign said they were 50% off."

The cashier looked at John like he was crazy and said, "The sign means that the apples are normally $2 each, but they're on sale for $1 each."

John was still confused. "But how can they be on sale for $1 if they're normally $2?" he asked. "That doesn't make sense."

The cashier sighed and said, "Just buy the apples or go away."

John sighed and bought the apples. He still didn't understand how something could be on sale for less than its original price, but he didn't want to argue with the cashier anymore.

John walked out of the grocery store, still confused. He didn't understand why people used figurative language. He just wanted people to say what they meant, so he could understand them.

John's literalness caused him a lot of problems, but it also made him a very unique person. He was always seeing the world in a different way, and he often came up with creative solutions to problems.

One day, John was at work when he was asked to come up with a new way to organize the company's files. John thought for a moment, then he said, "Why don't we just put all the files in alphabetical order?"

Everyone in the room laughed. "That's the most literal thing I've ever heard," said one of his coworkers.

But John was serious. He thought that alphabetical order was the most logical way to organize files. And it turned out that his idea was a good one. The company's files were much easier to find after they were organized in alphabetical order.

John's literalness may have caused him some problems, but it also made him a very unique and creative person. He was always seeing the world in a different way, and he often came up with creative solutions to problems.