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extrication

By Sarah LennPublished 5 months ago Updated 5 months ago 1 min read
Photo by Nothing Ahead on Pexels

A year of no-contact is pressing

its awareness back into my consciousness

it took a number at my service counter

intrusively flashing in bold red numbers

sliding into my morning coffee break

It paraded itself in a fancy designer suit last month

when your birthday came and went

and I swallowed my silence back down,

as if I could digest it more thoroughly this time

as if I would choose this for myself

for some detached, aloof reason

instead of circumventing walking willingly into a fire

again and again

+++

Six months ago you sent a smoke signal

as if to say -

"see what you're missing" -

with a disinterested tone that implied

you couldn't care less one way or another

that I had extricated myself from your personal

shooting range

sometimes laden with rose-petaled words

often daggers

No apology for the last round that found its mark

sunk deep into my flesh with an audible

"complicated" and "I forgot" thunk

that scar has just begun to fade

~~~

When I said we should be friends

I didn't opt in to be your odd man out

waiting on your whim of the month

always drawing the short straw

How much humility did you think I had in me?

How much disregard did you think I could absorb

before I let it go

cut the line to be free?

I will freeze these words too with a simple

'publish' button-click

lay them out neatly in black and white

to replace the red

Quiet the "wish it could be different" voice

because it can't and it isn't

and here it will rest, unchanged

(the sole witness to our funeral)

Free VerseheartbreakStream of Consciousness

About the Creator

Sarah Lenn

Using writing as a way to capture snapshots of emotion on a screen whilst life happens. And life has thrown me some curve balls. Always striving to find a path through the chaos...

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Comments (2)

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  • Aarish4 months ago

    This piece reads like an open wound that has finally learned how to heal. Sarah’s command of rhythm and tone gives the writing both rawness and grace.

  • Omggg, that smoke signal is sooo real. Your poem was so heartbreaking and relatable. Loved it!

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