Stream of Consciousness
what i should have said
follow-up to what i'll never get to say — top story, october 2025 no. when my husband asked me if you were someone he needed to worry about, i should have just said no and left it alone. but some part of my brain reads things like these as dares. and for all my strength, i am as weak to my own witless urges as the next impulse-impaired adult. it screamed "prove it" until i did something drastic and reached out to you.
By Maia Gadwall the metAlchemist12 days ago in Confessions
Word of the Day: 実習
Well my teacher did an impromptu zoom meeting with me which I really appreciated. Basically wrang me a new one very nicely about how I need to get my homework in. I am pretty sure I can actually do it now that I see what her methods are and the 3 channels she mostly uses so, that will make navigating things a lot easier as I wasn't sure where to look most of the time.
By Kayla McIntosh12 days ago in Confessions
Watching the Clock
Today was the last day of this terrible weekend. My kids would (hopefully) be returned tonight. I know that it seems to concern people by my use of the word hopefully, but here is the deal: my ex and I have a custody order. It has a list of rules that we jointly agreed to follow. One of those rules is regarding parenting time and exchange times. But, another one of those rules is regarding safety needs that we agreed to follow in the best interests of our disabled son. Those safety needs are not getting followed. Why not? I don't have a good reason. I have offered to help purchase the needed items. I have offered to help find grants or other ways to pay for said items. I have asked why the safety needs that we agreed upon are not being utilized.
By The Schizophrenic Mom12 days ago in Confessions
Two girls, one library, and a hunger for worlds beyond your own—Part 4 A
When i am thinking back, is difficult to imagine all that—no fear for exams, most of them not. All that being something normal the exam. All that confidence and light heart without the negative stressed care...hm...how i was even possible to be like that?
By CA'DE LUCE14 days ago in Confessions
Two girls, one library, and a hunger for worlds beyond your own—Last part
🌙 “How could I have forgotten all of this?” Because life pulls us in a thousand directions. Because adulthood layers over childhood like sediment. Because pain, distance, and responsibilities bury the softer memories. But they don’t disappear. They wait.
By CA'DE LUCE14 days ago in Confessions
Two girls, one library, and a hunger for worlds beyond your own—Part 5
A world where purity was called naivety/ A life where exams intertwined us/ A glimpse of an adult you remember for life He saw: • a girl who didn’t pretend • a girl who answered honestly • a girl who didn’t have access to luxuries • a girl who worked hard • a girl who had dignity despite scarcity . His smile wasn’t mocking. It was respectful. He recognized your sincerity — and maybe even admired it.
By CA'DE LUCE14 days ago in Confessions
Thoughts on Vocal and the way the world is . Top Story - January 2026.
"Death cannot stop true love, only delay it." – Wesley in The Princess Bride. I decided to come back to Vocal on a very cold and dark night at the end of December. I had been, and still am, convalescing from a horrible staph infection that had gone misdiagnosed for months. This, paired with the increasing challenges of being healthy, making the best choices for my co-parented child, being a wife, and being a director at a new job, was a lot to manage.
By Jazzy 15 days ago in Confessions
Two girls, one library, and a hunger for worlds beyond your own—Part 3
The maths teacher, he tried to speak with my father then back. Nothing came good of that! Quite the contrary. So latter, when he, my father, moved in a small city, where i went further to another high school, and he put me out, i had the occasion or the luck, to ''land '' at the door of my cousin and her brother, after 1 am in the night! I had a small luggage. And trembling from fear and cold! Her brother was married with 2 children there and his sister in 2 rooms. Somehow, there was found a place for me! I will not tell you the reason my father throw me out. Or maybe I should?
By CA'DE LUCE15 days ago in Confessions
Two girls, one library, and a hunger for worlds beyond your own - Part 2
During elementary school, we sometimes had to move. For entire seasons. Entire school semesters. When the drought came one year, a bird disease also appeared. Grandma, one of the most famous breeders in our village, for birds, chickens, and geese, lost everything! And we lost the peace of of mind for the next day. We had to move to another village. Near our Aunt, sister of my father.
By CA'DE LUCE15 days ago in Confessions
