Changing the Attitude of “Do This or Do That”

Changing the Attitude of “Do This or Do That”

In life, we often encounter a rigid mindset, where everything is defined by directives, orders, and instructions—"Do this," or "Do that." This attitude of dictating and being dictated to creates an environment where individual creativity, freedom, and self-discovery are stifled. It’s as if life becomes a series of tasks to complete rather than a journey to experience. Yet, what happens when we challenge this mindset? What if, instead of being told what to do, we are allowed to explore, make choices, and learn from them? Changing the attitude of “Do this or do that” is not only about fostering independence but also about nurturing human potential, encouraging growth, and creating an environment where people can truly thrive.

This essay seeks to explore why this shift in attitude is so necessary and how, by embracing it, we can unlock the potential that lies within each individual.

The Problem with the “Do This or Do That” Mentality

We live in a world where rules and instructions often govern our lives. From a young age, we are told what to do—by our parents, teachers, and society. We are taught that following directions is the path to success. “Do your homework,” “Choose a practical career,” “Follow this plan,” and so on. While structure and guidance are essential, the danger lies in becoming too dependent on being told what to do, or worse, in losing the ability to think for ourselves.

Imagine a young artist, full of imagination, being constantly told to follow a specific path: “Paint this way,” “Use these colours,” “Don’t stray from the guidelines.” Over time, this artist may lose their unique voice, their creative spark dimming under the weight of instructions. The same is true in any field—whether it's a student studying for exams or an employee working under a micromanager. The constant pressure of “Do this” or “Do that” robs individuals of their ability to innovate, to question, and to find their own way.

One example that speaks to this is the education system in many parts of the world. Students are often taught to memorise facts, follow set procedures, and regurgitate information on exams. Critical thinking and personal exploration sometimes take a backseat to these rigid structures. Many students, when faced with the real world, feel lost because they have always been told what to do, without ever being encouraged to think for themselves. The joy of learning, discovering, and creating can be diminished when everything is reduced to a set of instructions.

Why a Shift in Attitude Matters

Changing the attitude from “Do this or do that” to “Explore, think, and decide” is transformative. It opens the door to self-awareness, personal growth, and the development of problem-solving skills. When people are given the freedom to choose and to think, they learn responsibility, they develop confidence, and they start to understand their own capabilities.

Take the example of a child learning to ride a bicycle. If the child is constantly told, “Pedal this way,” “Turn that way,” or “Go faster,” they might struggle to find their own balance. But if the child is encouraged to try, to fall, and to get up again, they learn through experience. They discover what works for them, and when they finally ride confidently, it is not because they were told to “Do this or do that,” but because they learned through their own efforts.

The same principle applies to leadership in professional settings. A manager who constantly tells their team, “Do this” or “Do that” may see results in the short term, but over time, employees may become disengaged, feeling like they have no ownership over their work. On the other hand, a leader who empowers their team to take initiative, to think critically, and to make decisions fosters an environment of trust, creativity, and innovation. Employees who feel trusted are more likely to take pride in their work, to go above and beyond, and to grow both personally and professionally.

The Power of Choice and Responsibility

When we shift from giving orders to offering choices, we also teach responsibility. Life is full of choices, and with every choice comes the responsibility of the outcome. When individuals are allowed to make their own decisions, they learn to weigh options, consider consequences, and accept the results, whether good or bad.

Consider the example of a teenager choosing a career path. In many families, parents dictate what their child should study: “Become a doctor,” “Study engineering,” “Take this course.” While these may be well-intentioned suggestions, they sometimes disregard the child’s own interests and passions. If, instead, parents encourage their child to explore different fields, to understand their own strengths, and to make their own decision, the child not only feels empowered but also becomes more committed to their chosen path. The sense of ownership and responsibility for that decision leads to a more fulfilling and meaningful journey.

One of the greatest lessons life can teach us is that we are responsible for our choices. When we are constantly told what to do, we lose the ability to make decisions and, consequently, the ability to own our mistakes or our successes. Changing the attitude from “Do this or do that” to “What do you think is best?” fosters a sense of accountability and personal growth.

Creating an Environment of Growth

A shift away from the directive “Do this or do that” mentality creates an environment where growth becomes possible. Growth does not happen in rigid, controlled environments; it happens in spaces where there is freedom to explore, fail, and learn.

For instance, companies known for their innovation, such as Google or Tesla, create work environments where employees are encouraged to think outside the box, to challenge norms, and to take risks. These companies understand that progress happens when people are not limited by instructions but are instead driven by curiosity and the desire to solve problems. When employees are given the freedom to think and act on their ideas, they not only feel more engaged but also contribute to the company’s success in ways that would not be possible in a more controlled, directive environment.

Conclusion: From Directives to Empowerment

The attitude of “Do this or do that” has its place in certain contexts, especially when guidance is necessary. However, when it becomes the predominant way of interacting with others—whether in parenting, teaching, or leadership—it limits the potential for growth, creativity, and self-discovery.

To change this attitude is to open the door to empowerment. It is to trust individuals to make decisions, to explore possibilities, and to learn from their experiences. It is to foster an environment where people are not afraid to think for themselves, to fail, or to succeed on their own terms. Ultimately, the shift from “Do this or do that” to “Think, explore, and decide” is about recognising the inherent potential within every individual and giving them the space and freedom to realise that potential.

As we move forward in our own lives, let us be mindful of how we approach situations, whether in our relationships, our workplaces, or our communities. Instead of giving orders or waiting for directions, let us ask questions, encourage exploration, and trust in the capacity of others—and ourselves—to make meaningful, thoughtful decisions. In doing so, we create a world where individuals can thrive, grow, and truly contribute to the richness of life.