satire
Relationship satire can be cathartic; when love hurts too much, just laugh.
Seventeen Dollars And A Pack of Smokes Later...
If I knew then what I know now about the contents in that little black book, I would still sell it for seventeen bucks. Seventeen dollars was a lot of money to me back then. And it’s still a lot of money to me now. Hell, a man like me could live for up to two weeks on money like that. It’s just a matter of knowing how to stretch it, Aunt Patty used to say.
By Danny Velez5 years ago in Humans
Roger
The problem was Roger didn’t like to stick to a schedule, and I was dependant on one in order to maintain basic human function. Routine was not just important, it was essential. I am not an organized, nor generally motivated person, but at every hour on the hour my phone would create a persistent ‘dinging’ noise and I knew I had to move onto the next task at hand, otherwise I would slowly spiral into a void of procrastination and apathy towards hygiene, nutrition and physical movement. It had happened many times before, the last time becoming quite dire, which is why I sought Roger out in the first place. Accountability I liked to think. Surely my fear of confrontation coupled with a raging anxiety driven need to please others would keep me accountable to my new housemates schedule and therefore to my own. But Roger didn’t like to stick to a schedule.
By Georgia Toews5 years ago in Humans
MoneyTalks
You struggling for money? Well, money is struggling for you. If money could talk: "I'm literally all over the place, I am having trouble understanding who I am. I've got so many different names, sizes, shapes, and labels. I have branched out from coin to crypto and material to immaterial. I'm now tons of things: investments, trades, bought and sold. I try to make life easier, but I feel trapted. I am not just the largest sum of money. I am every piece of money that has ever existed. I stay quite torn for being both hated and loved.
By Leah Hayes5 years ago in Humans
Capricorny
I would be astonished to learn that astrology pre-dates the fermentation process or the discovery of certain chemicals in plants. It is simply not possible that a non-altered mental state looked up at the heavens and came up with these shapes, let alone the stories that accompany them. The Big Dipper, sure. Orion? yeah...kind of. Most of the others? Not even if I squint and spin in a circle.
By Dennis Coleman5 years ago in Humans
Little Black Book
Its early afternoon in mid-January and I am in the second day of a road trip, driving my newly purchased old car west on I-40, slowly approaching the Texas panhandle. There is very little traffic but we have all slowed to a crawl due to an icy rain. The storm is moving east and I am moving west, so I am hopeful that I will reach New Mexico by nightfall. I haven’t decided on my final destination yet, but it will be in the southwest part of the country and it will be somewhere warm. This journey west is the result of a series of odd events that I’m still having trouble wrapping my head around. It started two days ago as I was walking through my neighborhood to the grocery store.
By Jeannie Wisto5 years ago in Humans
A Short Ribbiting Fairy Tale
Once upon a time, back when people believed in magic and feared witches as they should, a young German prince made a horrible mistake. He was out in the woods and came across a well. Most wells today have lost their charm, but in the prince’s day some wells were a home to a witch. And if you dropped her a coin, a gem, or offering of another sort that pleased her, she would grant your wish.
By Sasha Nichols5 years ago in Humans
Take My Hand
I don’t think she sees me. Ever walked in on something and immediately known it’s supposed to be private? That you’re intruding? I’m not talking about surprising someone coming out of the shower, or accidentally walking into something spicy after your roommate forgot to hang a sock on the door. Those are obviously situations where you’re clearly not wanted or expected.
By Ben Whitelake5 years ago in Humans
Spoilt for choice
Hal was an analyst. Seeing other people going about their day without thinking of the long-term consequences of their actions made him feel superior in every way. What utter nonsense it was to make life-altering decisions with your gut and to take risks that might lead to chaos. Being rash and shortsighted were the biggest flaws of humanity in his opinion, since the impact of even the most unimportant seeming choices could some day leave you alone in a world without purpose.
By Zora Kastner5 years ago in Humans
Unwelcome guest
“Knock, knock.” Someone’s at the door… who could it be? I checked my watch, realizing how futile the action had been, considering I hadn’t expected anyone all day. And yet, here we were, someone knocking at my door and me hesitating whether or not to check who it was.
By Natalia Perez Wahlberg5 years ago in Humans
