There once was a kid named Blaze
Who stayed in his room all his days
His mom assumed porn
Instead he played Korn
To prove that it's not just a phase
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A quick update:
I was truly blown away by all the entries! You all provided me with great and much needed laughs.
In the end, it came down to these five (sorry Paul):
Nantucket fish bucket - Raymond G. Taylor
The Jokes on me 😆 - Lamar Wiggins
Sometimes You Can't - Kelli Sheckler-Amsden
Wazzock - Mike Singleton 💜 Mikeydred
The Phantom's Phallic Fury - Diane Foster
In the end, Diane's takes home the very humble top prize! Apparently, my soul sought crude or timely humor. Thank you everyone that participated and please accept my Haypennies as reward. If for some reason, I missed one you wrote, please drop it in the comments, and I'll make sure to read it!
A/N:
The world is too serious these days. Enjoy a corny Limerick. Better yet, write one of your own and drop the link in the comments. Sunday, I'll tip the one that made me laugh the most a dollar.
If you've enjoyed this, please leave a like and an insight below. If you really enjoyed this, tips to fuel my coffee addiction are always appreciated. All formatting is designed for desktops. Want to read more? Below are the best of the very best of my works:
About the Creator
Matthew J. Fromm
Full-time nerd, history enthusiast, and proprietor of arcane knowledge.
Here there be dragons, knights, castles, and quests (plus the occasional dose of absurdity).
I can be reached at [email protected]
Keep reading
More stories from Matthew J. Fromm and writers in Poets and other communities.
Throne of the Beast
“Lock and load.” Knight One’s command echoed through his helmet, drowning out the helo’s thumping engines. Knight Two sat across from him, his mechanical gloves thumbing the safety on his oversized auto shotgun clad in etched black metal. Knight Four scoffed silently, his face obscured by the jet-black helmet. An uncivilized weapon for an uncivilized man. There are already enough of those in this godless world. Two always seemed unsettling, like a big frothing dog in a constant internal struggle of, “Should I bite or hump my master?” It was no wonder Callsign General loved Two, even if Callsign Archbishop barely tolerated him. One was the Archbishop's girl.
By Matthew J. FrommExclusive • 2 years ago
One Unchecked Box
"Republished" because it was the only way to add the embed for the newly recorded audio version of this story due to the Top Story badge. Plus it serves as a nice, informal announcement of the podcast's revival for another season (go subscribe!):
By Stephen A. Roddewig7 days ago in Fiction
Comments (36)
LOL. Sorry Paul. hahaha. I still got a mention even though I didn't win. lol. Well done to you, sir, for hosting this bit of mirth-making and well done to those selected. I believe I've read most, but will double check soon to ensure I have read them all! Good show all round!
Thank you Matthew this was a fun ‘don’t be serious’ moment we all needed And Diane’s is sooo funny I’m still laughing. Is that wrong?
hahaha, after a really sh*t week of musk and cheeto this made me laugh! Thank, and congrats on Leaderboard!!
Made me laugh. Thanks!!
Wooohooooo congratulations on your Leaderboard placement! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Hah!! This was hilarious, can't believe I missed it!! Congrats on honourable mention this week!!
Thanks for the shout out and congrats to everyone
Thank you so much for this honour! It was a fun challenge, and I loved reading all the entries!
Annnnd I did one in time enough, lol. https://todaysurvey.today/poets/the-jokes-on-me%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E.%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Ha ha. Not sure what's worse. Porn or nu metal. Thanks for the opportunity to be even kornier, possibly pornier too. Also thanks for reading and for your kind words before I managed to post this: https://todaysurvey.today/poets/nantucket-fish-bucket%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Have a laugh but.. No offense to Michael Jackson. https://todaysurvey.today/stories/cat-jack-insane%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
I'm remembering interstellar!! will send mine soon
Hope this meets the criteria https://todaysurvey.today/poets/henry-david-thoreau%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
very funny entries
Some very funny entries, here's mine! https://todaysurvey.today/poets/the-phantom-s-phallic-fury%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Here is mine https://todaysurvey.today/poets/wazzock%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Great challenge, Mathew; how could I resist? Here is my entry. I had some others, but they probably went a bit too far. https://todaysurvey.today/poets/my-stick-my-stick%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Here be another! https://todaysurvey.today/poets/last-pube-stranding%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Well I wrote one, after reading Paul’s rendition. I thought might as well Please forgive me: https://todaysurvey.today/poets/dat-s-gonna-hurt%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
This is hilarious and seems like a fun challenge!
You gave me the okay. Remember that. https://todaysurvey.today/poets/a-young-american-named-matthew%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3C/div%3E%3Cdiv class="css-w4qknv-Replies">
Here you go sir! This is an old one that I republished for this lol! https://todaysurvey.today/poets/old-roger-the-soap-dodger%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/span%3E%3C/a%3E Enjoy the disgustingness.
I'll add this to my February List and drop an entry soon
Okay, I'm in.
Ahh, 'Freak on a leash' is the first song that comes to mind. And I'm positive I'll be singing it in my head for the next hour or more, so thank you for that, lol. Looks like you ignited some inspiration in Kelli and Mother, haha. Of course, I'll try to come up with something before Sunday.